Friday, April 5, 2013

How did I do anything else?

Good Morning!  It is overcast and cool this morning!

I used to be a real estate appraiser, as well as wife and mom and I don't know how I did this.  I don't know how other women work and manage their family.  Things suffer and I know this and I really feel like the family suffers.  I know Rory needs me to take care of him and do all sorts of errands for him.  I know Mari needs me to help her get through school, as well as take her to and from school. I know Marissa needs me.  I am really glad I can be home to take care of them.  I am currently reading "The Confident Woman" by Joyce Meyer and the part I am reading right now is about the Proverbs 31 woman.  In my marriage, I wish I had trust and confidence in my husband.  I feel like I am the only responsible person in this relationship.  This is hard on me, but I try to take care of myself.  I did get some exercise yesterday, but I beat myself up, when I don't get the exercise I had planned.  I sort of know it is ok to take care of me and take some down time; but in many ways, I am very hard on me.

Marissa has a physical this morning and Mari and I are going with her for support.  Mari and I are going walking while she has the appointment.  This afternoon is mainly at home.

I know with Marissa, that if we say we are leaving at a certain time, we had better leave at that time and especially this morning.  We left at 9:30 and took her to the doctor for her physical.  After a whole lot of paperwork, she went in and Mari and I headed out for our walk to the lake.  When we left, the woman at the front desk said it would take about 30 minutes, so we walked to the lake and back, but not around the lake.  It was still about 2 miles, so I was happy.  Came back and waited for another 45 minutes.  I had forgotten my Kindle.  After that we went to lunch and then to Target.  Came home and I took a nap.  Now I am doing home stuff.  It is being quiet in the house, as Rory went out.  Mari is taking a nap and Marissa is hanging out in her room.

Rory came back and had to talk to me in the living room.  He did not know where the city hall for our area was.  It moved several years ago.  Why do I know these things and he doesn't?  Poor Marissa is so tired.  I finished going through what we spent last year and tried to set it up into some sort of a budget.  It depresses me.  I  am going to tell Rory about this, but it won't make any difference to him.  I also need to start asking for more money, once a month.  I guess I need to start making dinner.  It kills me how much money we put out every month and I, really don't know where to cut back.  Rory wants to go out for his birthday and Father's Day.  Money, just frustrates me, especially when Rory and I are in two different worlds.

Had dinner and watched TV and then Rory came downstairs.  He really did not want to deal with the money issue, but he did agree to put into our joint account some money, which helps.  I came upstairs to do some reading and I am going to bed at 10.

Good Night!  Trudi

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